Four fonts walk into a bar…

west end park - rockville md

Morning, y’all!

My wife stumbled across a bunch of old emails I sent her a decade ago, and apparently my strategy of woo’ing her was slipping in jokes ;)

It worked! So I thought I’d re-share some of them here in case they turn your heart on too…



Four fonts walk into a bar…
The bartender says “Get out! We don’t want your type in here”.

A guy went to a psychiatrist. “Doc,” he said, “I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I’m a teepee, then I’m a wigwam, then I’m a teepee, and then I’m a wigwam. It’s driving me crazy. What’s wrong with me?” The doctor replied, “It’s very simple. You’re two tents.”

A duck walks into a bar and asks, “Got any grapes?” The bartender, confused, tells the duck no. The duck thanks him and leaves. The next day, the duck returns and asks, “Got any grapes?” Again, the bartender tells him, “No — the bar does not serve grapes, has never served grapes and, furthermore, will never serve grapes.” The duck thanks him and leaves. The next day, the duck returns, but before he can say anything, the bartender yells, “Listen, duck! This is a bar! We do not serve grapes! If you ask for grapes again, I will nail your stupid duck beak to the bar!” The duck is silent for a moment, and then asks, “Got any nails?” Confused, the bartender says no. “Good!” says the duck. “Got any grapes?”


Articles I wrote this week:

MONDAY: Hack #1308: Put yourself in situations where you can’t even spend if you wanted to! — Here are 8 ways to hide money from yourself if your spending has gotten out of control!

TUESDAY: New Book (and Giveaway): “Work Optional” by Tanja Hester of — Another book by a blogger got released this week! Be sure to stop by and congratulate Tanja if you know her, or answer the question at the end of the post for a chance to win one of TWO FREE COPIES we’re giving away.

WEDNESDAY: Model Ts and Immoral Debts — Where I learned Henry Ford was massively against personal debt! And that you can still buy (working) Model Ts!

THURSDAY: You’re Hot, But Your Finances Are Not! — A Valentine’s reminder of how important it is to stay away from STDs… Sexually Transmitted Debt ® ;) (Yes, that’s actually trademarked! By a friend in our community even! –> Valerie Rind)

FRIDAY: How to Get Health, Wealth and Comfort… in 1890 — Some fun passages from a 100 year old pamphlet I stumbled across recently…. (and why you should never live in the city unless you want your kids to have “thin hair, saucer-like eyes, sunken cheeks, and emaciated arms and legs” – hah!)


Things I enjoyed from around the web:

This short (economic) story by Collaborative Fund –> “If you fell asleep in 1945 and woke up in 2018 you would not recognize the world around you.”

This experiment by David Perell –> “For days or weeks at a time, I will escape the present moment and only consume content published in a different decade. For example, if I want to learn about the 1970s, all my media consumption will consist of books, videos, and interviews published in the 1970s. By doing so, I’ll embody the mindset of people in a bygone era and gain new perspectives on the here and now.”

This idea of writing letters to CEOs –> “I realized something scary a couple of years ago: There is no way I could ever act on all the ideas I’ve scribbled in notebooks, even if I live to be 100. That’s why I decided to freely give away ideas for new products, marketing strategies and businesses.”

This mixed media and street artist –> Amberella

This coin collector… who’s blind! –>

What happens when you mistype gmail .com –>

This reminder by Uncle Buffett –> “If you get to my age in life and nobody thinks well of you, I don’t care how big your bank account is, your life is a disaster.”

And this definition of “The True Gentlemen” by John Walter Wayland, circa 1899 –> “The True Gentleman is the man whose conduct proceeds from good will and an acute sense of propriety, and whose self control is equal to all emergencies; who does not make the poor man conscious of his poverty, the obscure man of his obscurity, or any man of his inferiority or deformity; who is himself humbled if necessity compels him to humble another; who does not flatter wealth, cringe before power, or boast of his own possessions or achievements; who speaks with frankness but always with sincerity and sympathy; whose deed follows his word; who thinks of the rights and feelings of others rather than his own; and who appears well in any company, a man with whom honor is sacred and virtue safe.”

Virtuous weekend, everyone.

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